The Weekend Is Over

So this isn't just a blog. It's my outlet, my place to write my thoughts and it's my therapy, because I'm not going to pay someone else to give me their opinion on what they think I'm feeling and why. I know the cause, I know what I am feeling.

I am wondering about a lot of things all the time, just like any other human being on the face of this planet. Something I've been pondering lately:

What happened to being a man?

I see a lot of sensitivity out there. I don't have a problem with that so much as the fact that I see a lot of guys on social media who act like junior high school girls. The constant "woe is me" of a person who has absolutely no command of their own place in life. And these aren't the guys who have gone through horrible divorces and had their hearts ripped out and their place in the lives of their children disrupted. That I am there for ya on. I couldn't imagine not being here with my family. That's a hell I never want to experience and work everyday to make sure I never have to.

These are guys that seem so emotionally weak that they shouldn't be able to function in society,much less hold down a job or exist outside of their parents basement apartment.

When I grew up being a man was just that. You took care of your responsibilities, you watched over your folk and yes, it's okay to cry, but at least be a man about it. I mean there are times that you have to be just what you are, human.

I don't even cry at funerals and neither does my mother. I think we've discussed this and figured out that anyone who has led a good life is something to celebrate not mourn. I would cry at the loss of a friend or a family member, I have. I am human. And I suppose we are all built differently. Some of us have experienced things that have caused our heart to become stony rather than embrace our softer feelings. Sometimes you have to do that to survive what you go through. It's either man up or give up. I chose and continue to choose the former. 

Another thing I really have a problem with is those of you who think it's okay to tear down people in a public forum. Joking around with a friend is one thing, whether in real life or on social media, but to take someones personal life and talk about them like they are subhuman and to talk about their child in the same way is absolutely uncalled for. It's not only ungentlemanly, it's beneath us as human beings. I recently experienced this on social media and it made me sick to my stomach. It took away every bit of respect I had for the person who did it personally but also professionally. Sad thing is that I really enjoyed them professionally and thought highly of them. A badly placed word or post can really take away from you. It's hard to come back from that because when you rip down someone else I can't help but think what you say about me. 

Men, real men, can bring their thoughts to you face to face. Or virtual face to virtual face as it is as I have more friends online than in real life. People I respect and value their opinions. We really strip away that evaluation of someone based on their appearance and really get down to what they are inside online, I think. 

That's all my rambling for now. 

Peace.

S

Bad Morning

The Culprit:

Sams favorite cup. He wanted Sprite with his lunch. Unfortunately, some roughhousing between Sam and his sister ended up in a bad scrape to the roof of his mouth. 

The Cure:

Some Motrin and a popsicle. That at least numbed it for now. I know it hurts. But there's really no serious damage and sadly nothing can really be done for it but to heal. 

Oh and this helped too...

I've taken to shaving in the afternoons while they nap (Well while he naps. Logan is eight and plays quietly in her room. Don't tell Sam.) It's a quiet time when I can get my stuff done. 

So today was a shave together day. LOL 

Sometimes it's a blast being home with them. 

S

Old habits die hard...

And I don't...

It's not really anyone's fault. This is just the way things are and with the good being overshadowed by the bad, this is the way I am. 

People are just what they are. I've gone through life watching them. Some have proven loyal, others have shown what I already knew them to be. 

This little clip spoke to me. I don't really like people all that much. It's hard to swallow but it's a basic truth for me. I'm too soft hearted to like people much, they take advantage of me if I let them. 

I suppose this makes me a "really odd dude" as well. And it does serve a purpose. 

People who make it past the part where I am wary of them get the benefit of someone who will always stand by them. And that's worth the world to me. 

And the irony isn't lost on me that a guy who doesn't like people met one he ended up falling in love with and helped make two more. 

What a quandary! But I think I'll keep them. Here we stand. 

S

SoA Re-Watch Season 2

Wow. I'm now on my last episode of season two. I haven't been watching much of anything else.

I love watching the evolution of the characters throughout the show. Sometimes it's hard to tell who the truly bad guy is because, let's face it, they're all criminals. There's a certain black and white to it but many shades of grey here. They aren't all bad guys just a product of what happens to them and what they have to do to survive. Even the police that are "dirty" show faith and honor to the relationships they've made. 

If you've never watched it, I highly recommend it. The writing is superb. The acting is great. Even in the roughest parts of the show there are some great laughs. 

S

Sons of Anarchy Re-Watch

I'm thirteen episodes into my SoA re-watch. It's weird to go back through this show knowing what I know about it and see the foreshadowing that happens throughout the episodes. 

I've also noticed a lot of the characters actually switching lines in later episodes. Clay, Jax and Opie having an almost complete role reversal. Gemma berating Wendy about religion and turning to it later herself. Gemma and Tara basically switching places. It's a well told story. And I know the payoff at the end will be worth it. 

Season 2 will be watched this week and I hope to have finished up by the season premiere in September. 

I know some hate these shows. But I kinda like the bad guy/antihero shows. Jax, while having done some horrific things, is just a guy trying to get his family to a safe place in life and is willing to do anything within his power to protect them. I get that. I'm a dad and husband. So yeah, I can go there. 

Anyway, here's to a fantastic series. 

A night alone.

Sometimes I forget how amazing Sam can be. Helping around the house, shopping, hanging out. I need to write down the great times to remind me when the bad times come and that the good times are just right. 

I never thought we'd make it this far. We had such a rough start with him. Last night sitting there trying to get him to sleep (at 11:00. Sorry. He wanted Mommy) and just before I got frustrated, he looks up and says, "I want Mommy. But that's okay, I got you."

This is why I am glad that I'm a Dad. It's the little things.